bridal portraits

so saturday was the big day.  well not THE big day.  but the big day before THE big day.

i had my bridal portraits planned sometime in october.  then it poured rain.  and it was way too much work to to just reschedule them right away.  so i waited til yesterday to do them.  

it's kind of a fun day.  because you get to get all dressed up and not have ANY of the nerves - i kept saying, man i wish i could feel this way in 7 weeks - yes 7 weeks ill be in primland with my husband.  bow chicka wow wow.

anyways.  we met the photographer - after we got lost first.  he was so on top of his game and i loved it.  he had 4 different places picked out for the pictures, and he was SO spot on what i was looking for.  he took risks.  we ended up in a few places that said no trespassing.  i stepped over deer poop.  i stood in briers.  and i have poison ivy on my foot.

but i am STOKED about the pictures.  he was so carefree and so relaxed and so fun to be with.  all in all it was a great day of portraits.  and gorgeous weather.  and jeffery minnish is his name if you want to use him!

i'm ready for the big day.  minus all of the details that still have to be done before then.

date night

friday night was date night.  my bff4l was in town for the weekend for my bridal portraits (i'll post more later!), and so we decided to double date friday night.

generally gloria and spencer would probably not eat until 8 or so and then they'd go to an 11 o clock movie.  they're still young (aka a year younger than us).  jonathan and i are like old folks who eat at 5 o clock and then go to a 7 o clock movie, then back home to go to sleep (separately) by 9:30.  we're living large here.

so we compromised.  i say that lightly.  we decided to eat supper at 6:30 and then grab a movie from blockbuster.

we went to olive garden, and it was AWESOME.  so good.  

they were still unhappy that we had to eat so dadgum early.  jk.  they were just being silly.

here's my lovaaa.  he decided to go get a hair cut for our date.  i usually cut his hair, but he knew he wouldn't have time.  unfortunately to the barber "shorter on the sides a little longer on top" means shaved military cut.  hence the hat.  just kiddin boo it looks so good.

anyways, after olive garden we rode to target to get a few things.  then to get the movie - but blockbuster was closed.  so we just hung out after supper at spencer's place.

it was such a fun night though.  i laughed harder than i have in a while.  where i couldn't control it.  and then i'd re start thinking about something and loose it again.  ah i love those.

good night with good friends.

lunch with the sweet one.

this week i have just been flat exhausted.  it's the first time in the whole wedding process that i've just felt completely overwhelmed - like i don't know how this is all going to get done, and if i don't do it it won't get done.  that is a bad feeling.  i had a little melt down.  then i had to put my big girl panties on.

luckily my mom, friends, family and super hot fiance have stepped up to the plate to just chip in everywhere and do things for me.  

all that to say its just been a long week.  i'm tired.  like sitting at work my chinese eyes almost were shut completely - not that they have far to go on a normal day - but basically just pupils showing today.

so i decided i need to switch gears so that i could get some energy.  what to do.  go for a walk?  naw - its a little cold, i have a cold, and it was too early to be sweaty for the rest of the day.

eat something.  tried that. a graham cracker with peanut butter.  very tasty but still tired.  and i have a wedding dress to fit into, so i had to put a limit to that method.

drink some tea.  woops, eyes shutting a little more.

ah ha.  then i had it.  my oprah ah-ha moment.  if i needed fresh air and an awakening i needed to go see someone.  not just anyone.  my niece - caroline.

it was such a perfect idea.  jonathan and i surprised her for lunch.  she always gets giddy and shy around jonathan - and i love that.  he gets giddy and shy around her too.  i saw him blush today. ok made that up.  but i make him blush.  woops sorry. back to caroline.

we showed up, and she showed us how she picks the butterfly out of picture three.  then she got her lunch that she packed herself - a cheese stick, a piece of broken up american cheese, and a pb & j.  she is partial to cheese.

then we watched her play her preschool circle time games.  something like ra ra watch caroline jump jump - okay it wasn't that wording, but she jumped, and i watched.  the first kid got in the middle and just did a little foot movement.  caroline was next.  she doesn't just do foot movement.  she did rock star jumps for her straight 15 seconds of star time.  i was proud.

then if that's not enough when all the other kids go, most of the other kids gaze off into the distance or something. not caroline.  she bobs her pig tails (or whips her hair back and forF) and claps along for EVERYONE.  she loves it.  and i love watching her.

so after lunch i went on back to work - with my fresh breath of air - and i even pulled some creativity out.  i was so much more productive.  because of that sweet girl.

hope you all have a great Friday.  i can taste my butter biscuit, hash browns and simply orange.  $4.12 will be coming out of my checking account tomorrow.  and it's oh so worth it.

night.

a rhyming thing

this is a random post, but i laughed today and thought i'd share it on here - even though im so confident it'll be one of those things that's only funny to me. and gloria.

gloria and i have this thing.  well we have a lot of "things" that other people just don't really get.  but that's okay.

but we have this thing when someone says something - occasionally the other person will say something that rhymes with it.  then it continues on, and we'll laugh until we can't breathe while we secretly think of something else to top the previous rhyme.

no we're not 4.  

but yes it's funny.

and we did this today.  on my way home from work.  i started one.  then gloria rhymed it.  then i rhymed back.  and i almost rearrended someone because i was leaning forward on my steering wheel laughing out loud/hyperventilating.

i hope you all have a best friend to laugh at dumb things like this with.  k, have a good day. what do you say.  my head hurts i'm going to go lay.  i'll be married by this may.  kay.  hey bay bay.

meet people where they are.

i saw a pretty eye-opening awesome video on someone's facebook the other day, and that coupled with my bible study lately has convicted me strongly to love people differently.

obviously God calls us to love people who don't love us.  He says it's easy to love someone who loves us.  but that's not what Christians are called to do.  we're called to love the people who even hate us, would cause us harm, or plot negative things on our lives.  that's a completely different ball game.

then i saw this video...watch it.  the whole thing.  it will open your eyes too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LfeXxkbgCVE

on one of my facebook friend's pages this is a quote she has:  "Be kinder than necessary for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle"

i've always been completely struck by that.

so here's my conviction and thought.  let's start looking at people realistically - meaning that we KNOW each person we ever come into contact with is struggling with something - maybe cancer, maybe a death, maybe a bad boss, maybe just a cold, maybe getting over the flu, maybe a bad relationship, maybe bad news for the day, maybe depression - something.  everyone is carrying something with them.  of course people we meet are carrying great things too - newly engaged, a new job, pregnant, good weather outside, whatever it may be.

what id like to start doing is using the Holy Spirit to guide me in meeting people where they are - even if i don't get the chance to find out "where" they are - and loving them.  rejoicing for those that have good news, and mourning with those who are mourning.  this means not getting frustrated with someone who cuts us off on the road or speaks rudely to us when we haven't done a thing to them - loving those who are rude to us.  

there ya go - smoke on that - it changed my mindset a bit. 

girl bye.

i went to goldsboro last night to visit my best.  it's always so good to just hang out.  we know each other like the back of our hands, and that just makes hanging out fun and easy.  lots of laughing.  

i went to visit, but i also went because i needed gloria to help me pick out my make up wedding for my bridal portraits.  there's  a dependence there that i am perfectly comfortable with admitting.  yes, i did text her this weekend when she had the flu and i was getting ready for my shower and asked her what to wear.  then i sent her a pic of myself in the outfit to double check.  it's the norm.

so we hung out when i got there.  then we went to a moe's like restaurant called bonfire where we got burritos.  they were so good.  so so good.  i did miss the cute little men that yell "welcome to moeees,"  sof o crispy, black beans o pinto, steak chicken o groun bee?  yes i have them memorized.

then we were ready to go tackle the impossible and not fun activity of picking out my make up.  my face is usually red and my neck is white, making it nearly impossible to get a correct color.  i hate make up ps.

so we rolled up to gboro mall on a mission.  walked into belk to the clinique counter.  there sat a girl slouched on the counter that looked up and said "help you?"  

let me just veer on a sidenote.  i HATE rude customer service, and i do not always deal with folks such as these in a Christian manner.  i hate it.  i can't stand when i call somewhere and people are rude - seriously your job is to be nice to people.  i can't stand rude waitresses.  i can't stand rude people.  sorry, i'm praying for myself about this tonight.

so i knew it would be a long experience with homegirl.  so i told her what i needed, and she painfully stood up to go find the redness reducer solution.  gloria and i eyed each other like greeeaaatttt.

so then homegirl started puttin the make up on my face.  then she stops and looks at us.  and she says.  "so.  what'd y'all have for supper?"  hmm.  weird question.  socially awkward  much?  gloria and i look at each other and gloria says "bonfire."  the girl looks back at me and says "OH.  that does the same thing to me."  

OH NO she didn't.  she went there.  she said we smelled of burritos.  i even had gum.  yes i did eat onions, and yes my clothes may smell like a tortilla bar.  and they may even give me gas.  get over yourself.  so after we got over that, my lip was raw from biting it to prevent laughing out loud in homegirl's face.  

she lightened up.  and she did a bangin job pickin out the make up color.  so we were cool by the time i left.  dang.  honest much?

k.  that's all for now.

2 months

so i'm getting married in 2 months.  as of today.  i'm just trying to think what i'll be feeling like in 2 months from today.  hmm..i think i need to go to the bathroom.  just kidding.  kind of.  i just really want to pray for the nerves and anxiety to be far from me.

with the 2 month marker has come about 3000 things to do.  it's quite overwhelming.  i'm slightly a do it myself person.  unless someone offers and is totally on top of their game.  

for anyone that's engaged let me just give you an idea of what happens when you have 2 months to get married.

centerpieces - you better have your idea by now and you should start working on them - all 30 of them.

decorations - gag.  i absolutely hate this part.  creativity does not abide in me.  this is stressful.

invitations - these are going out today.  yipeee.  we were blessed because one of jonathan's previous teachers printed them for us.  and we love them!  but i don't love the lingering taste of envelope paste on my tongue or the obscene price of stamps.

programs - gag again.  we're creating our own.  creating - you heard that right, and what did i just say about my creativity.  yes.

bridal portraits - these won't be soo bad.  if the weather is friendly to us.  and if the weather could warm up i could possibly prevent my skin from shredding off my face.

okay i'll stop there.  i think this is the point that bride's start just being ready for the day to get here - and i'm ready - minus everything listed above!

have a great day y'all!

valentine's day.

valentine's day was so wonderful.  it started by jonathan picking me up from my house.  he was dressed in a pinstripe suit, and i wore my heels and new dress.  he wouldn't tell me where we were going.  he wanted to surprise me so he blindfolded me for the car ride.  after two and a half hours we reached the beach, where he had a lighted walkway with candles and rose petals that lead to a picnic.

SIKE!

so what we really did, was much much better than that.  and jonathan came up with the whole night - which was even better :)  so i really wore my jeans, long sleeve gray shirt, and cowgirl boots, and he wore his khakis, blue polo-ish shirt, and his cowboy boots.  much better than suits and dresses.

i met him here.

sunset lake.  gorgeous.  perfect weather.  just us.  it was so pretty and peaceful.

and jonathan cooked us some supper up on the grill.

yummy.  steaks and corn.  and a few other things.

my boo - he's a good cook. 

and the best part.  while he was cooking.  i was fishin.  unfortunately i didn't catch anything and i got a really expensive lure stuck in the lake.  woops.  but it was fun anyways.  fishin's not so much about catchin as it is about just being.  maybe that's because i'm not good at catchin.

then we ate supper here at the lake.

so pretty.  we just talked and laughed and ate.  so good.  really good.

and here's jonathan opening the card i got him.  it was really funny.

it said somethin about there's nothin sexy about this card except the person reading it.  OWW OWW!

and we gave each other gifts.  i gave him a new knife for the kitchen and he gave me godivas and foot scrub :).  then we went to krispy kreme and got some awesome donuts.  and we finished up the night using my foot scrub.  yes - blessed.

so i hope you each had a great valentine's day too.  because of this blog post i'm late for work - so enjoy it.  have a great day!

the one with ez cheese

y'all are blessed.  two posts right after another.  but i just thought i'd post a few pictures of the weekend - well a portion of the weekend.  

my nieces have some favorites.  baby phat loves marshmallows.  and she loves to climb in chairs.  caroline loves ring pops.  and she loves to look outside for "deers."

friday night mom and i babysat the girls for a few hours.  it was fun as usual.  we were able to enjoy one of caroline's very favorites.

this is ez cheese.  and wheat thins.  this is one of caroline's most favorite things.  we have a small game that goes with this food.  she asks me to draw something with the cheese on her crackers.

that sounds fun.  and it is.  i love doing it.  but sometimes my artistic ability is challenged.  let me back up, i don't have any artistic ability.  i think she knows that.

but she asks me to draw very elaborate things.  we started with squares, triangles, and C's.  now she requests pirates with hair and a parrot.  or monsters.  or a girl getting married.  or grandpa and ama.  or a giraffe.  

sometimes baby phat joins us.  and even puts her pop down for wheat thins.

i love spending time with them.  and i love that caroline gets so much joy out of something like this.  

it's the little things really.

a weekend with words. and hurt feet. and favors.

it's been a LONG weekend.  i am exhausted completely.  i will probably go to bed earlier than my grandma peggy tonight.

it's been a good weekend.  but long.  spent great time with friends and family and new friends.  

but the long part.  wedding favors.  i won't spoil what we're doing for those of you who are coming and don't know.  but we're making the favors.  and whoa.  who knew.  long process.  after april 16th i'll post pictures.  i'll gratefully give these favors away - and you better love them.  just kidding.  breathe. 

so today this is what i did.  after finishing a half of the favors.

this is my "old blue chair."  not really.  it's just an Adirondack, but i do like kenny chesney.  i decided to sit outside on the porch this afternoon and let the sun hit me.  while i read pioneer woman - black heels to tractor wheels.  seriously so good.  order it now.

i also did this.

read some of my old wedding magazines.  with dog-eared pages.  and reminisced the freshness of being engaged.  when all i had to plan was a place, honeymoon, attendants, wedding dress - those were such fun things to plan.  

now there are details and decorations.  yuck.  april 16th please come.

i hope you all had a great weekend.  i'll write more soon!

it's friday

i've said before - i LOVE fridays.  its a day that i try to do some things for myself that i can't do during the week.

i set my alarm for 15 minutes later.  i love that.  it makes a difference, really.

i don't rush in the morning to get to work.  i just take my time.  do what i need to do at home, get ready, then i leave.  whenever that may be.

and of course - i go to chick fil a.  right now i can taste my butter biscuit, hash browns, and simply orange juice from chick fil a.  stomach growl.

the other day i was on my online bank account and i noticed that i had a recurring charge of $4.12.  yep, that's chick fil a fridays.

so i hope you all have a great friday.  do something different.  give yourself some time.  go get your  nails did - or shilacked (completely spelled wrong).  eat something so fatty.  take your time and slow down today.

sweet boy.

real quick post.  jonathan is my fiance.  i'm going to marry him.  in april.  almost 2 months away.  slight scream. lots of sweat. but mostly excited.

anyways.  it has been a long week and it's just tuesday.

today i came home to a surprise at my house from my fiance.  i LOVE when he leaves me things.  we've started reading the 5 love languages, and well that is one of my favorites.  and written words.  and i love that jonathan gets that.

so i came home to this today:

oooh my favorite - some tea.  but there was more!

inside he left this:

this is youthberry tea.  a kind ive been wanting to get FOREVER from teavana.  and he got it for me :)  mmm it smells so good!

then there was this:

a love note.  not gushy.  cause i don't like gushy.  just sweet and lovely.

then he also left my invitations and response cards that he went and helped print :).  i love a proactive fiance.

i'm off to bible study.  have a great night :)  listen to rap music.  dance. read. drink tea. wear your cowboy boots.  whatever tickles your fancy.

What do you want to be when you grow up

for a short time in my life i thought i may be a Christian rapper.  yes.  serious.  ask mom.  i would rap Christian tunes in the car.  

unfortunately, music turned out not to be my talent.  and my dad's never been one for rap music.  and oh yea.  my fiance doesn't like rap music either.

so for now i just have to jam to some old school Christian rap songs myself.  in my car.  and i thought i'd share them with you.

stomp

do you want a revelation 

i played these in the car with jonathan the other night to try to get him movin.  didn't work.  in his world you sing hymns.  and you sing them slowly.  with or without background music.  with people who don't care if they can sing - old people preferably.  

oh well.  this is what we'll be playing in our house.  with a little "teach me how to dougie" occasionally.

well, since i didn't make it as a Christian rapper, i'm off to SAS.  see y'all.

spit out of God's mouth

wow.  i'm so slammed against a wall with conviction right now.  my soul is weeping, literally.  i feel almost nauseated.  

i am doing a bible study with a group of awesome girls.  we decided on Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  if you don't have it or you haven't read it, go get it.  you will not come up short on this one.  it will turn your whole mind around.  it will make you think, make you change, make you seek.  

i just read my two chapters for bible study and i'm sitting here moved.  i've talked to God about it, and i needed to get it out there to anyone else who reads this - five of you or five hundred of you.  my heart is busting.

In Revelations 3:15-18 Jesus says this...
"I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot.  I wish you were either one or the other!  So, because you are luke-warm - neither hot nor cold - I am about to spit you out of my mouth.  You say, I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing."  But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked.  I counsel you to buy from me gold refined int he fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see."

the truth is.  i am lukewarm.  and i feel sick about it.  i've read this verse numerous times, but it resonated in me, and i want so badly to trust that this feeling of grossness will not vanish but rather i'll be moved to change.  to action.  to passion.  to become a sold out Jesus Freak.

lukewarm for me means awkwardness or fear of a conversation takes priority over sharing the Word of God with someone who doesn't know Jesus.  lame.

lukewarm for me means putting God into a pocket of my life rather than having Him reside in all aspects of my life, all day long.  sick.

lukewarm for me means my faith is not bringing about action, like in James 2:17.  not right.

how do we get being "in love" with a person or get society's demands for us and we follow them - but we don't get Christ - our SAVIOR.  from HELL nonetheless.  we don't run after Him yearning for more, and dying to tell others about Him.  we're not running to the Word, we're squeezing it into the day.  i'm not sold out for Him.  

but i'm going to do something about it.  and i don't know how yet.  it's an issue of the heart.  but i know God wants more of me, and i am so filled with conviction that i want that.  

i'm ready for this:  

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says."  James 1:22

join with me.  get out of the lukewarm routine and rut of earthly life.  and let's run to God - to things above.  let's make life count for  Him, not for ourselves.  i don't feel like being spit out of the Son of God's mouth.

wordless weekend

it's been a wonderful weekend.  mom's birthday - we spent the whole day just being together.  wonderful.  i love her so dearly.  

here are a few pictures of super bowl sunday with all of the fam :)  hope you each had a great weekend!

just a swingin

ring pops and sour cream and onion chips for my kine

intensely focused fiance

my parents - love them.

mama and her girl

daddy and his girl

date night

last night was date night.  it was so great.  it was jonathan's turn to plan, and he just did so good.  whenever he plans for our date nights, he plans things that i will like more than he will.

i forgot my camera which made me mad last night.  because how am i supposed to effectively blog with no pictures.  but that's okay.  i'll just have to dress up my language to let you know how wonderful it was.

jonathan started by making me supper.  when i cook we have like breakfast for supper or something simple.  when jonathan cooks he goes all out.  for hours.  with herbs and special cooking techniques.  and details.  he loves to cook...i'm lucky.

so he made chicken with a tomato and wine (crunk) sauce with pearl onions and bacon.  then he made asparagus with pecans that were cooked in almond oil.  then he made croutons or bread pieces to put the chicken on top of.  it was fantastic.

oh and the best part - mozzarella sticks - homemade!  so good.

then we went to starbucks and had coffee and did our pre-marriage counseling packet for our counseling session sunday.  we laughed a lot.  we thought about funny answers we could put down.  but we decided against that - thinking our pastor may appreciate seriousness.  i drew little hearts on jonathan's packet just for fun.  my coffee was great.  jonathan's was just okay.  such is starbucks - in my opinion anyway.

then we went back to the house and i was treated :).  i got a foot bath with rose petals, then a kiwi foot rub, then a foot massage.  he's lovely really.  he LOVES to do this kind of thing for me, and i don't object - ever.

we watched walk the line too.

it was a wonderful night.  i love date nights.  they're so great.  i love his ideas better than mine.  i love him.

my love.

i've had writer's cramp lately.  maybe my life has been boring, not sure.  probably not.  but i realized today, that i have not written about someone veryy important.

my family's background with pets has never been good.  

one day a dog showed up in our back yard.  it was a mix of sorts.  big.  we started feeding it.  real dumb idea.  we named this dog bo.  my grandma peggy swears that bo gave her the look and wanted to attack her.  then one day bo got in a fight with a little dog, and the little dog's owner.  bo tried to eat our neighbor's leg and gave him 18 stitches.  that was bo's last day.

then there was holly.  sweet holly.  a pretty little black lab to help us get over bo's loss.  holly then bit my friend in the face.  and got hit by a bus (but lived).  and then turned a little coo-coo - trying to bite several people.  that was holly's last day.

then we bought durango.  oh durango.  he was a yorkie poo.  sounds cute enough huh?  we decided we weren't good with big dogs so we'd go with little dogs.  terrible idea.  he was so cute at first.  then he started to show signs of mental disorders.  he began eating his hair off.  stress probably.  he barked incessantly.  he bit at your ankles when you walked.  if he sat beside you you best not move.  or he would attack you.  mom and dad would keep him in their room at night, and my brothers and i refused to go in the room for anything.  he owned us basically.  poor rango.  he had his last days too before he gave us ours.

animals.  they haven't always been our best luck.  but oh, i've got good luck now.  here she is:

bunny.

yes.  i have a bunny.  her name is...bunny.  she likes it, and it is so fitting for her.  gloria got me the bunny for Christmas a few years ago, and i just love her.  she's really so sweet.  she does not bite (not people anyway - she loves molding).  she is so very quiet.  she hops around, eats her food, poops, and lets me hold and pet her.

not to mention my nieces love her.  whenever baby phat comes to ama's house she walks to the dining room and says "buh-e."  we play with her.  she's very child friendly.

she even loves to play board games.

i love her. 

special delivery

the doorbell rang today while i was brushing my teeth.  i thought it was jonboy, so i did a bad brush job and ran downstairs to get the door.

dad was home too, and he opened the door first.  it wasn't jonathan, it was someone else.

UPS.  weird.  then i started thinking - i just ordered some dried wheat off ebay for our centerpieces - it must be that.  that's what you guys generally think the ups man is bringing too right?

well i went outside to get the box, and it was small.  i was a little concerned.  the mason jars are a certain size, so we cant have small wheat, and it better not be folded up.

then i saw the box.  amazon.  hmm...must be for daniel, my brother, because he and dad are the only ones in the family that like to read.  

then i saw my name was on it.  what in the world.  so i opened it.  to find a VERY forgotten surprise i had pre-ordered for myself.  

that's right - black heels to tractor wheels by ree drummond.  she is the pioneer woman.  if you haven't read her blog, go now.  she just is wonderful.  she cooks.  she lives on a massive ranch with her cowboy husband and four darling children who wear wranglers and cowboy boots and herd cattle by horseback.  and she wrote her love story on her blog.  and i was obsessed with it.  i was late to work and class and all other planned things for the weeks that i discovered her blog.  and now she wrote a book, WITH ADDED CHAPTERS.  yes.  i'm stoked.  

the end.