Advice

This is a quick post for those who are engaged or nearly engaged.  I have a top ten list of advices (?) to make the process more joyful and less stressful.

1.  If you plan your wedding outside, plan an equally enjoyable/beautiful option inside in case of bad weather.  Luckily we didn't have to go to plan b - but our plan b was not beautiful or "us" at all, and it made the possibility of having to move there stressful.

2.  Buy your favors or contribute to a charity instead.  We made preserves and while I'm sure the guests liked them it was an incredible amount of work.  Buying sometimes works out cheaper anyways.

3.  Do not use a travel assistance program to book flights (i.e. Expedia).  Book directly with the flights as they are much more willing to work with you if changes come about unexpectedly.  Expedia no habla ingles - es muy frustratingo.

4.  Unpack your gifts as you get them.  The idea of coming home to a sweet little house and unpacking your gifts together seems so downright joyful.  While we appreciate our gifts, it would be much more enjoyable to open them and put them away as we got them.  

5.  Splurge.  We splurged on our honeymoon and after our honeymoon on "nesting" things.  We ate where we wanted to, we spent money on things we would not normally, and we enjoyed it.  The honeymoon is not a time to stress about money - enjoy the vacation.

6.  Don't Worry.  I worried for a good 8 months/23 years about walking down the aisle.  Pray for peace, and trust that walking down the aisle will not be nearly as nerve racking as you had imagined.  Enjoy that part.

7.  If you're a girl, take two days off of work for when you get back from the honeymoon.  You will need it for name changing crap that is not cute.  The DMV and social security works have made a sport out of being mean - look forward to that.  Laugh at them - but don't let them see you.

8.  Never tell an engaged couple that "it's such a sweet time."  You're lying and you know it.  Engagement is not sweet.  There is a lot of crying, a lot of raised blood pressure, a lot of worrying, a lot of to do lists, a lot of nit picky details, a lot of lust (oww owww), and a lot of waiting for the big day - that to me is not sweet.  Marriage is sweet.

9.  Don't tell people where you're going on your honeymoon until you have planned it.  People will give their opinions on everything you come up with, and they'll tell you what's wrong with every place.  Book your honeymoon, then if they ask you can tell them.  It's like baby names.  Once the baby is born and has a name people can't say "eww i dont like that."

10.  Adjust.  Get ready to adjust.  You can know your spouse for 10 years, but married life is different.  Living together is different.  Be willing to compromise.  Be willing to be wrong and say you're wrong.  It is an adjustment.

And that is the rest of the story.  By a married woman.

the wedding day

i'm back!!  i have a lot to blog about so hopefully i'll find some time to update this more regularly - now that i'm married :)

the wedding day was something i'll never forget.  i think it was a day a lot of people will never forget.  the day started with everyone obviously looking at the skies and waiting to see what God would have for us.  the forecast - tornadoes.  tornadoes.  in raleigh.  and we had an outside wedding.  with no real viable back up option.

i got my hair done - felt the nerves a bit.  i sat in the chair envisioning the day ahead.  after hair i headed over to the wedding location - montague lake.

the girls met me there, we had breakfast - though i ate barely nothing.  my stomach was a little knotted.  we continued watching out the windows.  saw a few sprinkles, dark skies, waited.

but then God did something huge.  the wedding song for the mothers to walk into came on.  we rushed out to the entrance to get ready for the processional.  the weather?  nothing.  overcast skies, but nothing further.

i have never in my life felt God's presence more than on this day.

here's dad and i walking in.  i actually was completely calm.  if you don't know much about me - this is a miracle.  literally a miracle.  i was calm.  i was collected.  i was completely in the moment.  right after this picture i think i got hit by a pinecone on the shoulder.  that was calming as well.

once down the aisle jonathan and i did our thing.  we said our vows, we gave our rings, we smiled a lot.  then the pastor prayed.

during the prayer pastor craig said something related to the Son and suddenly i felt sun beaming all over my shoulders.  the guests felt it too.  God was there with us.  it was the most memorable time of the wedding, and we are so blessed by what God did.

thirty minutes after the reception the skies opened and sent 62 tornadoes through raleigh.  downed trees, ripped roofs, porches dismantled.  we were untouched.  God held off this weather for us.  i couldn't feel more loved by a Savior that He looked at little jonathan and i and did such big things for us.  praise the Lord.  

love,

stacey lee

the one im gonna marry

jonathan.  hes so my opposite and im so glad he is.  calm, cool, collected, so optimistic, a dreamer really.  anything could happen, the best probably will.  hes loving and passionate and sees every completely weird thing about me and laughs and loves those too.  i make him say "oh my gosh" a lot, and that's okay too.

but i just thought i'd fill you in on who i'm about to marry.

today was a tid bit stressful.  for starters - and i wont get into details - because im anal and think people stalk my blog though theres probably one that reads it.  but when you are in a group of people, and not everyone is invited, and someone who is invited says something about seeing my saturday - that's stressful.  so i resorted to my only defense, and left the room awkwardly.

but overall just a bit of a whoa kind of day. 

then jonathan came over tonight so i could give him a hair cut.  and he brought the quilt i needed for wedding decor, and the easel thing for my bridal portrait.

he talked to mom for a while before i even said hey.  which is awesome.  i love that my family loves him.  like really loves him.  crazy about him.  i question if i am second sometimes - jk/ish.

then after talkin to mom he walked in gave me a little pop kiss on the forehead, then sat down, grabbed my foot and gave me a little foot rub.  i love it.  i love that this is what he thought he'd do for me tonight.  he didn't lash out that i had been irrational or get frustrated that my mind is all over.  he rubbed my feet.

so i think i'll marry him.  come saturday.  rain or shine.  God's got it all worked out upstairs, so i'll lean on that.

night.

bible verse

being in front people is my biggest anxiety.  i do not like being center of attention.  i do not like opening gifts in front of people.  i do not like for people to look at me.  i like to watch people.  i like to give presents to people and watch them be awkward.  i like to be around people - not in front of them. 

that makes for fun with a wedding - where i'm the bride.  you know.  the girl who sits in front of lots of people at showers and opens presents.  and the girl that walks into a song that is sung while everyone not only looks at me but stands and turns around and stares.  whew - a blast.

but in all seriousness ive had to rely on my Savior for this.  ive failed a lot at the whole trust thing.  i failed today when i was informed the weather reported tornado guests, thunderstorms, and rain for saturday - yippeee for outside weddings.  but God doesn't give up on me.

so here's a verse.  take it.  learn it.  keep it in your heart.  because it's a good one.  and if any of you are wondering what i'm thinking when im coming down the isle saturday this is it:

"Do not fear for I am with you.  Do not be dismayed for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you;  I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."  Isaiah 41:10

that's awesome.  that is awesome right there. 

signs of marriage

so we're on the countdown.  we've got 6 days.  woot woot.  i am really excited for the big day, but i am really more excited to leave the reception and head on vacation with my husband.  i can't really fathom things slowing down, but i know they will.  

here are a few signs of an upcoming marriage.

 

these are empty drawers.

this is where most of the clothes from the drawers went - packed for the honeymoon - woot woot!

this is the start of my new coupon notebook.

in the past gloria did the notebook for me.  i cut, she organized.  since i've lived at home i have stopped couponing and mooched off my parents.  at least i'm honest.  but now i am on to becoming a great wife who grocery shops frugally while sipping mochas in my work out clothes.  a girl can dream.

this is a dining room that has been hit by a wedding hurricane.  scary.

and lastly, this is a bottle of advil for headaches that greet me every day.  just kidding - but not at all.

i am really excited for the big day.  and im really excited for a slow down.  im excited to start a new life, get a new name, and go on vacation with just jonathan.  and oh yea - they're callin for thunderstorms on the 16th - so for all of the guests - go buy an umbrella and bring it with you.  an outdoor wedding, rain or shine :)

an early date night

i don't need to say it again - but wedding planning is nutso.  so jonathan and i decided to not succumb to it, and we went for an early date night.  i pretty much just decided what i wanted, and we did that.  jonathan's a go along kind of guy - and that works out well - because i'm not always a go along kind of girl.

so jonathan and i went out for supper?  any guesses where?  we went here.

it was so delicious.  we got to sit in the middle too, and i liked that.  i dont like sitting on the ends, because i feel like you get shafted there - by shafted i mean you only get 3 pounds of food instead of 2 1/2. 

jonathan and i like to sit and watch people and figure out what's going on.  well i like to do that, and jonathan has started getting into it too.  one couple in the distance was about 39 or so, and they were on a date.  so obvious.  they had just recently met.  they both probably picked out their outfits the night before. they laughed awkwardly.  jonathan and i decided we were SO glad we were over that stage - yuck.

the family next to us had a few quirks.  rude to the waiters.  blah - no need to be mean.

then the couple at the end of our table was so sweet.  there was a loner also at our table, and it's just never good to be a loner.  the couple at the end talked with the loner, and so that was good.

anyways - supper was great.  jonathan and i laughed a lot.  we talked about life and work and babies and farming.  we laughed at things our coworkers said.  we had a great time.

then we went here:

jonathan and i are not really 'splurge' type folks.  but we do splurge on chocolates.  we love godivas.  we try to go twice a month.  because we are godiva members and we get two chocolates free.  we know the godiva workers on first name basis - they know us - we distract them from other customers.  and the chocolates are so good.

then we walked around the mall and headed home.  by 9 o clock jonathan and i were wore out and we parted ways and went to sleep.  good night.  i am so ready to marry him.

phone calls

i'm not really a half way kind of friend.  not at all.  i am not one to have a hundred different friends that i know very little about their lives.  i'm one to know everything about a few peoples lives and they're my best friends.  i love friends who call just to say hey or text to see how my day's going.  i love to know my friends, and those are the people i want to spend time with.

tonight i got a phone call from one of my very best friends growing up - jess.  she's living in florida now training dolphins.  yes.  training dolphins.  when we were friends in 3rd grade she would draw life size dolphins and killer whales on the beach.  you could say she's always known what she wanted to do - and she is doin it!  

but back to my point.  she called tonight to check in on the wedding.  see how nervous i was.  just talk.  jonathan and i are actually going to the resort in the Keys that she works at for our honeymoon.  and we're stoked.  and we'll be swimming with her friends - the dolphins.

but i appreciate this.  i love this really.  i love the pick up where we left off kind of friendship.  i love that she keeps in touch.  i love that shes in florida and im here, but i know a lot about her life and she knows a lot about mine.  that's what friends should be like.  so i love her for that.  it was the kind of phone call i needed tonight.  yay jess.

surprises are fun

the title of this post is actually not how i really feel.  i really don't like surprises.  i'm very bad at feeling out of control and not in the know.  it is really not a good feeling to me.

but...for the wedding there will be a few surprises.  for you lucky blog readers - all 100 of you (wink), i am giving you a sneak preview of jonathan and i's first dance.  you may think we're traditional.  you may think we may forego a first dance even.  but we like to surprise people too.  so prepare yourselves.

this is it.

oww oww.  april 16th get ready.

please note the sarcasm.  and note that blog posts have decreased in excitement because all creative and available mind resources are going to the wedding.  apologies.